This blog relates to Wii Fit Plus. If you don’t know anything about that ‘verse you may not understand what I’m writing about. My apologies.
Dear Residents of WuHu Island,
Thank you for allowing me to use your excellent sports facilities for the last two years. I truly appreciate your enthusiasm for my fitness program. With the exception of a certain boxing instructor I have always found you to be 100% supportive in my training efforts. And I appreciate your ever cheering, ever smiling faces.
So I want to sincerely apologize for a couple of things…
- I’m sorry for monopolizing the Island’s only bike. On an island so obsessed with fitness I’m kinda surprised that there IS only one bike, but really I SHOULD be more considerate about the amount of time I spend on it.
- I’m really sorry about the number of times I’ve crashed said bike. But, I’m a push-the-boundaries kind of Mii, I want to see if nudging the bike off a cliff will kill me or take me to a short cut to another path. Also some times I’m not that good at riding the bike.
- O.K. … You know how some times I’m not really good at riding the bike? That is especially true when I’m ride up a hill at full tilt. I do the ole zig-zag maneuver and some times, when one of you fine people are in the way, you, um, fall off the road. So I’m really sorry about that.
- And I’m really, really sorry that I keep killing all your dogs. They are such wonderful, intelligent creatures. They are so helpful in my quest for flags and giant balloon/balls. But when I make a dangerous maneuver (like taking a ramp over water)… well… Fido doesn’t make it. I’m a Mii dog killer, and I’m not proud.
Now that I’ve gotten that off my chest I have a few things I want to ask.
1. Why do you have protective railings on about 25% of roadways but not on the other 75%? Did you just run out of money?
2. If you can mow the grass on a mountain side into the fancy pattern worthy of a major league ball park, why can’t I bike or hike up the same mountainside?
3. When I do a long run around the back of the Island a pack of little dogs jump off a cliff and land happily on the tarmac in front on me then scamper away. But when I’m on the bike and try jumping off the same cliff I plunge to my death. Why does gravity work differently for dogs than it does for girls on bikes?
4. Why does a jumps from one cliff result in a short cut while jump/fall from another, much shorter, cliff result in death? Who are you Mii gods? Why do you mess with my Mii mind?
5. What is the purpose of the PIT at the ancient ruins? Is it just to trip me up? If so, well played, sir, well played.
4. And most importantly where the heck did this van come from? And what is it doing in the WuHu village? (Yes, some times I play this game just to make sure the van is still there.)
See you tomorrow,
Nintendo is coming out with Wii Fit U next month! It promises a bunch of new games and a new Wii Fit Meter.
[All the above images are courtesy Nintendo, taken from my screen]
- Nintendo Wii U to offer free Wii Fit U trial in November (slashgear.com)
- Wii U sales triple in wake of price cut, Wind Waker HD (destructoid.com)
- Nintendo Wii’s last holdout is the United States as European shipments end (engadget.com)
- The Wii U has been available on the market with regard to 10 months (mrzhao1900blog.wordpress.com)
- Nintendo Wii U – New Console with Touchscreen Controller (epicagames.com)
- Free Wii Fit U trial starts Nov. 1 (games.com)
- Nintendo reveals Wii U games at E3 (waldbauerr.wordpress.com)