Little things prompt me to action sometimes. Today, for example, an article entitled “How To Be A Woman” came across my feed and it sparked in me a need to respond. I found it limited, insulting and misogynistic.
Clearly a bee got in my bonnet and I felt the need to write my own list of What Makes a Real Woman. Here goes…
What Makes a Real Woman
- Be true to yourself
Luckily you don’t have to be a Woman to follow these guidelines. They also hold true for What Makes a Real Human Being.
In “How To Be A Woman” author Clarrisa Taylor advises to, among other things…
- play dodgeball,
- enter a male-dominated work field (and not leave to have a child),
- learn to fall asleep without a man,
OK. Not my definition of Womanhood, but, if that’s how she chooses to define her life…
I had more of a problem with her advice to “Show everyone how big your heart is” by falling in love with a broken man and not trying to fix him. Advice that, to me seemed more appropriate to a romance novel or a list entitled “How to Tell if You are a Woman in an Abusive Relationship”, maybe.)
But, the one that really got me was #4 …
4. If you get raped, share your story. Make sure your voice is heard. But don’t prosecute him. You’re above that. This is how you win.
YES. Share your story. YES. make sure your voice is heard. Absolutely. But “don’t prosecute him”? “You’re above that.” ? WHAT? If you have been the victim of rape or sexual assault I hope you will prosecute the perpetrator, because the likelihood is that they’ll do it some one else. Seeking help (at qualified centers like MCASA in Maryland or NSVRC nation wide ) “is how you win.”